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Fear

By - Dr Nunglekpam Premi Devi
Independent Scholar

I have a fear, a fear of dread darkness;
So wild and too forbidding, within me;
‘Darkness’ instill unauthorized, making me shaky;
All I feel is nowhere round, I traveled far off;
Losing ever inch of my bravely confidence,
I struck loosely nowhere infusing shady phantoms;
Its mortal dark and, I see things! I cried loudly
Hang in there! Wait and look for me!
Mother! Mother! Still all, quite and hush;
I lost self presence, ‘fearing’ quieting my breath;
Concealing all colors, darkness the one rules hallucinating;
Breathing in and breathing out, as I stand still
Silence speaks all, merging more wraiths stilly.

Perturbed every single night, Uneasy lies within me;
Afraid! Collecting ‘nura’ wasn’t welcoming;
Fear as hell, darkness has eaten me all;
Stretching out my arm searching nura, here and there;
I stopped breathing, not an inch I see unclear,
I see things, many things as I could imagine, marching towards;
Get me a light; get me a podon! I cried loudly,
None hears the call, neither attended, I surf along vividly;
Still continued, searching unsighted with the unseeing eyes;
Loosing total control, one arm out and one pulling back;
I flattered dangers, ‘mother’ stand by me! I whisper   
Hating ‘self’ consciousness, I roar within loud out;

Fear rules, as I stood kneeling reaching out hand.

I have a fear, a fear of dread darkness;
Ceasing my arm, I jumped in the empty, halting;
Suspended searching, one and two and three,
Onto the bamboo stalks, I never did found ‘nura’;
What was that? I hold onto, soft and cold creasy,
Feeling shocked touching out ‘toad’ breathing underneath;
I cried of danger and I scream for the light;
Jumping back and front appealing and pleading;
Light! Light! As do I beg, Mother watches me over;
I feel blessed beholding distant podon lights, overwhelming;
And she bubbles away frothing ‘smiling’ adorably;  
Assembling my senses, I tried instilling darkness into lights;
I walk through reoccupying, with lamp in the hand.

One and two and three, I looked around searching;
Blinking eyes open out, with a lamp in the other hand,
Oh! There you are! Connecting to abandoning piece;
Catching and holding firmly, I spaded faster;
Turning back sooner, overlooking podon in the left,
I run and rush faster as I could; dashing and smashing;
With one heap breath, flash! Go away the little light;
I flipped inside the door, soothing breathing;
How great! I throw it back in the dark wilderness;
Lessening ‘Fear’ that forbidding within me.

William Gurumayum

William Gurumayum, Sub-Editor of Imphal Times is a resident of Sagolband Salam Leikai. He has been with Imphal Times since beginning. He also looks after the website and application of Imphal Times. An avid adventure lover, writes mostly travelogue.

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